Dear Fat Celebrities,

BEFORE:

AFTER:

What the fuck? Chris, have times been that rough? You look like someone stuffed you full of marshmallows and then got you high. I know I'm not in perfect shape, but you're really pushing it. Smokey definitely went to rehab for smoking, but I didn't know he needed fat camp, too. Whatever the case, Chris, the winter is almost over, and I damn sure don't see you as the hibernating type. Maybe you should hit up that Timbaland workout plan and get on the treadmill, or hit the stairclimber, or something. Oh wait, not even Timbaland is safe.

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Looks like you were eating well after that multi-platinum album a two years ago, literally. Madonna looks like you prey, not your friend (then again, you seem like you're eyeing a much more fulfilling meal). But seriously, what is the problem? For people with copious amounts of expendable income, you guys should take care of yourselves. If Star Jones can lose two people and Michael Jackson can lose ALL of his melanin, you guys can drop some poundage.