Dear Michael Jordan
"Now, I can own you on and off the court!"
via The Wall Street Journal:
Michael Jordan, arguably the greatest player in basketball history, has reached a deal to buy an NBA franchise. Mr. Jordan has agreed to buy a majority interest of the Charlotte Bobcats from Robert L.Johnson, the team's majority owner, according to a statement released by Mr. Johnson Saturday. The deal is subject to league approval. Terms of the deal weren't disclosed, but the sale price was beneath $300 million— "in the mid-to-high twos," said a person familiar with the matter. Terms of the deal were not disclosed.
Mr. Johnson, the founder of Black Entertainment Television, paid $300 million for the expansion franchise in 2003, but the team has been losing money amid a rough economy and years of poor on-court performance. In the past two years, the team has attempted to save money by doing everything from shedding at least 40 front-office jobs to saving as much as $15,000 a night by hiring cheap halftime-entertainment acts. Neither Mr. Jordan nor Mr. Johnson were available for comment.
Michael, you are the greatest player to have lived, in my opinion. Numerous childhood memories of basketball were shaped by the man we know as Air Jordan. It would seem as if being a player of that caliber would afford you an unparalleled knowledge of basketball. Unfortunately for you, Mike, that hasn't been the case. For lack of a better word, your decisions while dealing with the Washington Wizards were stupid. Kwame Brown turned out to be nothing more than a punchline, and other than you playing, the Wizards went nowhere but home during your tenure as Director of Basketball Operations. With Charlotte, you were given a minuscule role, just pouring money in, rather than making decisions, which hasn't turned out too bad.
Enter 2010, and we hear that you're finally going to buy a controlling stake in the Charlotte Bobcats. *GASP* My heart jumped into my esophagus upon hearing that news, not because I was excited to see you in the front office, but because I know what happens when you and money get involved (1993 gambling controversy anyone??). Michael, the Charlotte Bobcats are on the rise. They just had their first All-Star nomination in Gerald Wallace, Stephen Jackson is still playing out of his mind, and they just made a trade to bring high-flyer Tyrus Thomas in. All signs are pointing forward for the franchise. Now, I'm not going to sit here and say that the Bobcats are destined for doom with you at the helm, because Bob Johnson didn't do much himself. #imjustsayin that your track record has a few holes in it when you're not on the court. Michael, I wish you all the best of luck as the owner of the Bobcats. Just make sure that as the new owner, you at least get a stylist, because no owner should be coming out of the house looking like this...
For someone who revolutionized fashion, you'd think he wouldn't be shopping at TJ-Maxx...
