Dear Reverse Sexists

So, because I don't look, dress or act like this, I'm emasculated... -____-

via The Bulletin:

Despite what feminists might argue, real men don’t wear skinny jeans. Real men also don’t wear V-neck tees, or accessorized scarves, and they avoid purple and pink like the plague. The mere idea of a pedicure or waxing makes a real man nauseous. If a woman hangs out with this kind of girly-man routinely, it’s only because she wants to share his wardrobe and his non-fat caramel macchiato. A woman can’t imagine a man reloading his double barrel shotgun or chopping wood when he’s donned in Donna Karan and drinking an Appletini. Men were meant to wear rugged Wranglers, leather jackets and boots, like they belong in a James Dean movie and not an episode of “Will & Grace.”

When did men in America go from being masculine steak-eating, plaid shirt wearing, Old Spice smelling, cigar smoking cowboys who like football, hunting, and Clint Eastwood movies to skinny jean wearing, satchel carrying, pierced ear metrosexuals who like chick flicks, “The View,” and Bath & Bodyworks? The American man is an endangered species due in large part to the over-feminization of society. Not surprisingly, the arrow of blame points towards the feminists who have transformed our schools into gender neutral zones of indoctrination. Early on, boys’ innate masculinity is suppressed by banning competitive, rough games like dodge ball and tag on the playground, having co-ed teams, not keeping score in soccer games, and rewarding passive, demure behavior.

Boys learn to subdue their more spirited, intrepid behavior in elementary and middle school, their male instincts of competition and individualism quashed in the interest of what’s best for girls as they walk like lemmings over the edge of the radical feminist cliff by the time they reach high school. Because of the feminist movement, boys aren’t allowed to be boys - society has fenced them in, corralled their adventurous enthusiasm in the name of sexual equality. The end product is pantywaist pushovers who will cry during “Steel Magnolias” and urinate sitting down. This is bad news for America, who will eventually have to reap what the feminists have sown, which will be a paucity of male leaders, entrepreneurs, scientists and heroes.

DISCLAIMER: Please do NOT take this letter regarding the wild ruminations of some wacko beat writer as my disdain for women altogether. At the same time, realize that not all of this applies to any one person, group or gender. As a society, we don't really treat the opposite sex as equally as we should, on both sides of the picture. What ends up happening is that people have to assume roles within their sex in order to feel secure in their sex, which leads to many of the misconceptions and misunderstandings between males and females. This letter is about women who feel the need to tell a man to 'man up', forgetting that they don't even know what it feels like to be a man...

One of the things I see a lot of, especially during trending topic hailstorms, is people airing out their grievances against the opposite sex. People gripe about every possible relationship problem they could ever have, and make known their ideas about what their relationships entail. The one that bothers me the most though, is the argument that men should 'man up'. Man up? What does that even mean in a literal sense? Absolutely nothing. When women say it to men condescendingly, such as the writer above, I have to ask you, do men tell you to 'woman up'? Throughout history, the plight of feminism was to gain equal standing for women and loosen their traditional role in society. Today, though there are many pitfalls to this goal of equality, huge strides have been taken by women. That said, what happens when the roles of men are generalized by women? We can't really speak out on that, can we?

I mean, when is the last time you've seen a "men's support group", helping men feel more secure about themselves or less constricted by gender roles? I can't think of any time. The truth is, masculinity is one of the most rigid structures in society. There's no room for movement. If a man doesn't fit that traditional role of a 'man's man', chopping wood, playing football, eating steaks and breaking women's hearts, he gets labeled as a p*ssy or a b*tch or whatever derogatory term is the letter of the day. But that's not the point of this post. Women telling a man to 'man up' is sooooo much worse than a man doing it. After reading Ms. Givalry's post, I have to ask you emasculating women, have you ever been a man? Do you know what it physically (never mind emotionally) means to be a man? How can a woman try to put a stereotypical gender role on a man, when she's trying to break free of one?

See, I don't get the 'men can't show emotion' and 'men can't be interested in their appearance' arguments. First of all, show me any woman who would go out with a man who didn't look relatively put together? I'm not saying he has to be fresh out of a spread in GQ, but ladies, could you see yourself dating the spawn of Oscar the Grouch and the kid from the Peanuts with the cloud of dust around him? Second of all, why is the spectrum of emotions for men limited to anger, happiness and sexual desire? Can a ninja be sad or upset for once?? For a man to open himself up to you, and be willing to share his feelings beyond those rudimentary ones is a big step for most of our kind. Downplaying it as him not being 'man enough' is about as small-minded as it can get. It's as if you get all of your ideologies about men from watching 'The Expendables' (great movie, by the way). How can YOU as a woman toss ME as a man toss me your copy of 'The Man Laws' and expect me to take you seriously? In today's world gender roles should be able to bend both ways, not just in women's favor. It stands as a testament to feminism, in a universal sense, where no one is restricted to what society deems worthy of manly or womanly. I guess my point is this ladies: If you want to sit around and talk about how men should 'man up', then you can never be upset when a man questions your feminine charms. You'd be erasing all that false power you'd built up in your head under the guise of feminism, and probably not feeling too pretty afterwards. Support the men in your life as they are, not as you think they should be...

Dear Racial Ambiguity

In about 200 years (pending the End of Days, 2012 and any catastrophic world disasters), when we look back on the cultural and biological makeup of humanity, this will be considered the beginning of a society of homogeneous people. This letter is weird to write, for two reasons:

A) How easily skin pigmentation fragments us. No matter how much people want to say that they are color blind, the skin (and it's color) are the first thing that one sees. People take skin color to indicate much more than it should, even in today's 'post-racial society'. That a newborn child has more or less broken every rule we knew about genetics, and skin color, is a shock to most people nor an easy pill to swallow. The birth of this 'white' baby to these 'black' parents (note the quotation marks) is the beginning a new era in human genetics: that of racial ambiguity. Because of you, the entire notion of skin color will die in a matter of centuries. People won't be too happy about that either. For many, skin color is a delineating mark. With your advent, there is one less marker for people to judge with.

B) As a black person, proud of my heritage, it's exciting, yet disconcerting to think that race may die out. Where will the culture and folklore I've grown to know end up? Will they be celebrated as a part of your new hold on humanity, or will some cultures scatter like dust in the wind? Will some parts of your 'new race's' culture hold still, while other parts get discarded as useless or classless or outmoded? How can we be sure that in 200 years black or Hispanic or Asian culture won't die out or that one won't be held up over another?

Both A) and B) are legitimate concerns, but this birth signals a pivotal time in humanity. Racial ambiguity, you've long been a heralded black sheep in genetics. Your tendency to make people 'universally beautiful' is lauded, yet people chafe at the racial issues that come into play. I can only imagine the kind of internal strife that this child will experience in it's post-latent years. From taunts to questions to weird looks, that baby's blond hair may be as much a bane as it is a blessed surprise. Then again, in this post-racial society, where your presence is heralded, she may very well be a golden child. Who's really to know at this point? What we do know is that somehow two black parents, with two black children, birthed a child who would be considered traditionally white. Racial ambiguity, it stands to say that your shroud will still be appreciated in a post-racial society, though it still may not hide you from criticism. You're something that people fear but secretly lust after. That this child achieved it through natural birth is incredible. Hopefully by the time she's old enough to write, her racial identity will be solid and understood to her, but really won't even matter any more...