Dear Detroit Pistons

These four might as well not see the court again... No bailout needed

In the wake of this ridiculous spending and fear filled marathon, otherwise known as the trade deadline, the NBA season has picked up A LOT. Carmelo finally did what everyone knew he was going to do, Deron Williams was burned at the stake by the Mormons Jazz, and Jeff Green is now that kid in your neighborhood that moved away. Not even Baron Davis or Mo Williams were safe. To say it was a panicked trade deadline would be tame. It's funny that the team that stayed pat is still worse off that most squads.

If it isn't closing public schools, or boasting in car commercials, it's keeping your team the way it was at the beginning of the season, allowing what was a respectable franchise last decade to turn into a laughingstock. Detroit, for the past four years, I don't think I've seen a team fall so far from grace. You've been in the middle of 'rebuilding' since 2008 when you shipped out Chauncey Billups for Allen 'Turkey' Iverson (double entendre, don't even ask me how). Rodney Stuckey has been decent at best, Tayshaun Prince has been little more than the big fish in a small, moldy pond and long gone are the days when two men named Wallace were the pillars of the Motor City. That said, you've seen better days, but none worse than last Friday when half of your team staged a 'player protest'.

What's funny about the protest is that between Tracy McGrady, Richard Hamilton, Tayshaun Prince, and Chris Wilcox none of these guys have played extensively enough or well enough to warrant any loyalty. Your team has tried to commit to a tenet of keeping around veterans, when it's clear that these players couldn't hack it if they had arms made of axes. Sure McGrady's had a few good games, but what else can you expect from a former scoring champ? The Ben Gordon experiment has proven that combo guards don't work in the Motor City, and Charlie Villanueva has barely showed flashes of brilliance, mostly in meaningless games. To put it shortly, your rebuilding process has NOT gone well.

Ironically, some good has come out of your laconic season. Austin Daye is proving that he wasn't just a no-name WCC player with a highlight tape and Greg Monroe is playing incredibly, making double-doubles look easy. If anyone is worth keeping, it's those two guys. Will Bynum? Expendable. DaJuan Summers? He peaked at Georgetown. Jason Maxiell? He's the poor man's Milsap with no jumper. The rest aren't worth a line. Except for one other person: your coach, John Kuester. Kuester has proven that trying to turn a bunch of former somebodies into 20 minute per game rotation players will NOT work. He's completely mismanaged your team and you know it. Joe Dumars might as well coach this team himself. I'm sure he could help what good pieces you do have grow some cojones before the rest of the East becomes a whirlpool of talent again.

The trade deadline came and went, and you guys stayed pat with a mediocre team. Even though the CBA is hanging by a thread, Detroit, you still have a chance to bring this team back to relevance. A) You need to drop John Kuester immediately. Everything about that man screams pushover in the locker room and it's obvious with how erratically you play on the court. B) Get rid of the old, dead weight. That includes Hamilton, T-Mac, Prince and Wilcox. You can't start rebuilding for the next dynasty if you have leftovers from the first one. C) Make sure you keep Austin Daye and Greg Monroe. Those two look like a dynamic duo in the making, just waiting for Austin Rivers a great point guard to take the reigns. No, it won't be easy. No, it won't be quick. But it's better than believing you can recreate another Bad Boys replica with a bunch of Grumpy Old Men, especially ones that call sitting out of practice for a day 'protest'. Long live the car industry, because basketball isn't happening for a while...

Dear Carmelo Anthony

God help the team that gets you...

For the past month, there are a few topics that have been beaten to death and cremated in the sports world. But one stands above them all, Carmelo. The continued drama of where you'll end up is starting to put me to sleep. Every time you turn around, there's a new rumor. 2 weeks ago it was the Nets, this week it could've been the Knicks, and now it's the Lakers. What gives? I feel like you should say something to clear this up, especially since your team isn't really backing you up. I suppose that's what happens when the spotlight is on you... You clam up.

I can't help but be reminded of all of the times you choked under pressure, or failed to show up. Your teams have always been good, and you've been considered a superstar, but this year it seems like you're not even in the game. Earlier in the season, with Chauncey Billups hobbled by a broken wrist, the Nuggets seemed flat. Although you were able to get to a record of 31-25 coming into the All-Star Break, that's only good enough for 4th in the Northwest Division and 8th in the West. Okay, so the West is stacked... So what? Aren't you a superstar?

It pains me to see all of this speculation of you making the move to New York because teaming up with Stoudemire might screw both of you up. It would be the joining of two unstoppable but unimportant forces in the NBA. Both you and A'Mare are defensive liabilities. You never guard the best player on the other team, much less make defensive plays when your team needs it (see: Paul Pierce in NY). When Kobe comes to town, why's Aaron Afflalo guarding him? When you guys take a trip to Miami, should Gary Forbes be tasked with guarding LeBron? These are questions that've plagued you through your career, even with the Playoff runs and your development of a masterful offensive game.

Speaking of offense, you and A'Mare are considered two of the best offensive players in the league, but never seem to score when it matters. A week or so ago, you scored an NBA season high of 50 against the Rockets, which is incredible if you completely ignore the fact that you lost! You managed to drop 50 points and lose, Melo. Come on, son. You didn't even have any assists. That, oh Brooklyn native, is the definition of a meaningless scorer. Yes, you came out and dropped 42 2 games later in a win, but you weren't even in the game to hit the game winner, having fouled out. The superstar doesn't do that. The superstar is the guy everyone is scared of with the game on the line. I certainly wouldn't be afraid of you if I were another NBA defender. It just goes to show you that no matter how good of a player you are, if you don't have that x-factor, that umph, that extra push, it doesn't matter.

Melo, you probably will end up a Knick, if not by the end of the week then by the end of July (*crosses fingers for CBA revision*). While it's exciting from a fantastical standpoint, basketball wise, it will be business as usual for you. Yet no one talks about that. The media is hyped up in the formation of another multiple-headed monster in the league, and rightfully so. It will probably be that same media that crucifies you if and/or when you and A'Mare choke inevitably. It's okay though. You can always take solace that you're from Brooklyn. No one can take where you came from away from you. Only YOU can destroy your own legacy, though. Hopefully you don't bring the Knicks down with you too...