Dear Record Companies

From West Indian block parties to underground ciphers, piracy has always been around...

via The Register:

The music industry is sticking to a self-valuation that has been rejected by various courts and has now been described as “absurd” by a New York judge.

Judge Kimba Wood has handed down an opinion in the LimeWire damages case that challenges the industry’s belief it could be owed more than the entire global GDP for one year.

After LimeWire lost the case last year, the trial moved into the damages phase, with hearings starting next May. In an opinion (pdf) [1] published ahead of the damages hearings, Judge Kimba Wood revealed that the record companies, seeking statutory damages against the music-sharing service, are seeking damages predicated on the “number of direct infringers per work” – leading to a damages claim of as much as $75 trillion dollars (according to Wikipedia, total global GDP is around $69 trillion)".

You know an industry is in the middle of a flux when it grossly overvalues itself and insists that the rest of humanity respect its inflated self-image. It just so happens that this overvaluation is a constant staple of the music industry, where fickle fans, new technology and constantly changing winds make an accurate understanding damn near impossible. The music industry continued that trend over the past two weeks when a gang of you record companies decided to hold Limewire accountable for $75 trillion over its enabling of file-sharing. I almost gagged when I saw that figure. $75 TRILLION?!?!?! Since when has the music industry been worth more than the entire world's GDP? Seriously... I like music, and I'm sure the rest of the world does too, but not that much.

And to boot, you're suing Limewire of all companies. If you guys really had your hand on the pulse of the music industry, you'd know Limewire was played out after my 9th grade year (2002, if you must know). Additionally, if you were really paying attention, you would've been up on the online music grind from jump, so that you could've had a stake in it. Torrents, sharing websites and iTunes beat you to the punch and now you're on the outside looking in, trying to bust the windows. Now that you're behind the curve, it's like you're trying to put a four-alarm fire out with a water gun. Hell, now the blogs are running the game, giving away your artists' music (at least in hip-hop; can't speak for every genre) and all you guys can do is shut down onSMASH for a couple of weeks.

If your preposterous claim against Limewire is a sign of anything, it's that the little man always has a one-up on the corporation because the corporation is too focused on the profit rather than the product. That you guys are finally getting your day in court is too little, too late, and the judge handling your case proved that when he called your claim 'absurd'. As a matter of fact, that's just the first in a long list of words I have for your general greed and lack of insight into your own business. Either way, I and the rest of the bajillion Generation-Y music fans will somehow find a way to download music around your egregious blocks to fair distribution of music. Are you going to threaten legal action against all of us? Probably. God save the poor sap who gets nabbed with that law suit. Will it work? Probably not. Maybe you should take notes on the new wave instead of trying to cram your way in after the lights have come down.

Dear Gucci Mane

BURRR!!! BURRR!!! BURRR!!! You know what that is, Gucci?? BURRR!!! That's the sound of all the cold, hard cash that you lost by going to jail for 6 months. Yes, you said it yourself, that your incarceration came at probably the worst time possible for you. Yes, you served your time like a good rapper with good lawyers sense. Yes, you even spoke like you had a left brain upon your release. However, it goes without saying that we have to get on you about jail. Do you realize how idiotic the charge was that you got knocked over? All you had to do was stay sober! There are so, so, soooo many things that you could have done besides smoke and drink. You could have been playing Scrabble, or teaching Waka Flocka how to read, or finding new and innovative ways to peddle rocks with a rap career as a front. Hell, you could've been in a Wale video instead of an afterthought on a t-shirt. Gucci, it's not that I enjoy making fun of your incarceration, it's just that I find the situations you get into hysterical. Whether its leaving dead bodies behind middle schools or violating parole by not showing up for community service, you tend not to make the best decisions with your legal affairs. Not even I could have predicted you going back to jail after this PSA. Maybe you're just a good actor...

Dear Jan Brewer (re: Arizona Immigration Reform)

Photoshop in an Arizona police badge and we have the same scene...

via The Washington Post:

Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer signed into law Friday the most restrictive immigration bill in the country, setting the stage for a showdown with the Obama administration and reigniting a divisive national debate less than seven months before congressional midterm elections.

Brewer, a Republican facing a stiff primary challenge, said she had no choice but to act because Washington's failure to address the issue had effectively left border protection to the states. "We in Arizona have been more than patient waiting for Washington to act," she said, as hundreds of demonstrators gathered outside her Phoenix office. "But decades of federal inaction and misguided policy have created an unacceptable situation."

Even before it was signed, President Obama criticized the Arizona law, which requires police to question anyone who appears to be in the country illegally. Obama called the effort "misguided" and directed the Justice Department to monitor its implementation, warning that it could violate citizens' civil rights. Immediate legal challenges were expected from outside groups.

There is a huge difference between protecting the interests of the many and protecting the ignorance and small-mindedness of the few. That said, in a lot of states below the Mason-Dixon line and under the influence of Republicans, the ignorance of the few seems to reign supreme. Governor Brewer, I always thought Arizona was towards the forefront of a cordial relationship with immigrants, particularly those from Mexico. However, with this new bill focused on immigration, I can see that you and your state are about as bass ackwards as Glenn Beck attending an NAACP meeting. You see, by throwing this piece of shit legislation out, you're more or less saying to every non-white immigrant 'You are not welcome,' regardless of whether they are legal or not. This new bill doesn't enforce anything other than your own insecurities that in another 20 years, whites will no longer be the majority in your state (or much of the Southwest US, for that matter). What's the matter? Afraid that the popular vote might not swing your way again? Well, with laws like these being enacted, your hold might be a lot shorter than you think.

I mean, really.. Do we have to take it back to Nazi Germany, where any person remotely varying from the German ideal was asked 'Where are your papers?' Is that what misunderstanding and ignorance about other cultures have driven you to? Unlawful searches and unwarranted stops? By enacting this law, you're essentially giving the police the green light to racially profile people. Not that racial profiling wasn't an institution already, but I suppose having it on paper makes it all the better for you guys. Civil rights and general parity in the reach of the law don't matter when you've got a bunch of day-laborers immigrants to keep from adding to our GDP bogging down our infrastructure. You tell those wetbacks to stay on their side! And if they try to go out without identification, you arrest them and hold them for unlawful reasons! I wonder how long until they legalize racial profiling up here...

Dear Washington Wizards

What did he really do to deserve this??

via The Washington Post:

Gilbert Arenas was charged Thursday with a single count of carrying a pistol without a licence, a felony that carries a five-year sentence, but the Washington Wizards guard has reached a plea agreement that would result in much less or even no jail time, several sources close to the case said.

Arenas is scheduled to enter his plea on Friday afternoon before D.C. Superior Court Judge Robert E. Morin. Even if prosecutors agree not to seek prison for Arenas, it will be up to Morin whether to sentence Arenas to probation, community service, a fine or some combination. The judge, a former defense attorney, also could send Arenas to jail.

Regardless of whether Arenas goes to jail, the star's future in the city that once embraced his jocular personality and his ability to hit clutch jump shots is in doubt. The 28-year-old former all star, whose birthday parties made the television news, has been suspended indefinitely by the NBA, and it is unclear whether a felony conviction would give the Wizards the right to void the remaining four years of his six-year, $111 million contract.

There are certain moments when the direction of the law makes absolutely no sense. It's a sad day when the justice system completely overshoots it's boundaries and makes a move to severe for it's own good. That said, Wizards, it's an even sadder day knowing that you threw your player under the bus for something that turned out to be a joke (by some accounts). Yes, Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton (who should be kissing Gilbert's ass for the rest of his life) were in the wrong for both having guns in a locker room, and for making light of it afterward. Gilbert is getting charged with an unlicensed pistol (funny, because Dick Cheney can ACTUALLY shoot some one, and not even be arrested), facing 5 years of a felony, and you guys decide to turn your back on him.

Not only is that foul ethically, but Gilbert has done soooo much more for the Wizards that Caron Butler or Antawn Jamison. Antawn is too scared to take the big shots, and Caron Butler has been playing terribly this year. In fact, the first player you should be cutting ties with is Caron. At least Gilbert is playing like a shell of himself. We could just blame it on the government's knack for knocking black athletes harder than anyone. At the end of the day, had you guys just stuck by Arenas, you might not have won a 'ship, but you wouldn't be poised to take a nosedive in the East. Too bad Javaris didn't get the long arm of the law.


Can anyone deny how ill Gil is??