Dear Lil' Kim

Rap beef is pretty much played out... There, I said it. At this point in hip-hop, most rap beefs aren't based on anything other than hot air, hearsay and rappers' vanity. Back in the day, there seemed to be some substance behind the conflicts in hip-hop, whether it was turf wars, gang-related, or actual name calling. Nowadays, if you say the wrong word on wax or make reference to someone's past (coughcoughMCHammercoughcough), a diss track is coming your way. Such is the case with your latest offering Kimberly. Now, Kim, not to diminish your place in hip-hop, because you do have a half-decent legacy, but you know good and well that your 'beef' with Nicki Minaj is little more than a desperate attempt at regaining the spotlight.

Kim, when is the last time you put out a track? I can't name one, much less remember the last time I heard your name called out loud in reference to anything related to a song. You've gotten more press on MTO in the past year than on any hip-hop blog or hip-hop show. For God's sake, you were on Dancing With the Stars, the rest haven for has-beens looking for a way back into the limelight. By that virtue, your entry into this beef is completely ill-placed. It's as if you saw Nicki Minaj's celebrity growing each day, and decided that you were the only plastic surgery-enhanced, weird hair-colored, overt sexual lyric-spitting MC that should be considered. You know what that is? That's the definition of a hater. I despise that word, but you've got to call a spade a spade sometimes.

First of all, Nicki Minaj said little, if anything directly correlating to you on 'Roman's Revenge'. That you took it as such means you're a little salty over something completely imagined. Why are you mad? Second of all, how are you going to call out Nicki for 'biting' when your whole stee-lo was bitten. Biggie wrote your entire catalog up until 'La Bella Mafia', and even after that, every popular song you had was biting some other song. If it wasn't 'The Jump Off' using The Lost Boyz' entire chorus, it was 'Lighters Up' taking Junior Gong's flow from 'Welcome to Jamrock'. Kim, you're the last person who should be talking about originality. Sure, you started the whole explicit lyrics from a female MC trend, but as you've gotten older and more and more grotesque (anyone who thinks Kim looks good has vision problems), that ploy has gotten older and older. Not to mention, I damn sure would rather watch Nicki Minaj rap than you. All those voices and different flows? C'mon son... Nicki is entertaining, and you know it. The woman might be as vapid as a tube of hot air on wax, but she sounds cool doing it.

Let's face it, Kim. Your era is DONE. You and Foxy Brown had your time in the limelight then essentially fell into obscurity for Lord knows why. That both of you are coming at Nicki now is sad. You two are old dogs trying to learn new tricks and failing terribly, while Nicki says the truth: When you pop up on a Billboard track, then she should respond. Until then, you should just go pump more silicon into yourself and see if you can re-work more of Biggie's raps to sound like you. That'll get you more shine than trying to push your way back into the scene with a diss track. 50 originated that, and look where he's at. It damn sure won't work for you, especially with a weak diss track like that...